Sunday NFL Ticket - The Myers Way

I go through this every single year with DirecTV.  Same song and dance.  They go up on their prices for Sunday NFL Ticket.  I threaten to cancel.  They give me all kinds of discounts.

This year was a tad different - initially.  I found out DirecTV was changing the Sunday NFL Ticket package to remove SuperFan and make it one package.  Really what they did was remove the online viewing part of SuperFan, renamed it “To Go” and put everything else (Red Zone Channel, Game Mix, Shortcuts and HD) into the base package.  What's all that mean?  A renewal price of $300.  Most people would feel like this is ridiculous to pay but the way I look at this is as follows: $300 divided by 17 NFL weeks equals a little more than $17 a week to be able to watch every single NFL game from the comfort of my home, on my computer and/or on my BlackBerry (which will be extra cool when I cop this new BlackBerry Torch when it comes out next week).

Now for a fantasy football geek and football addict like myself, $17 a week is pretty damn good if you ask me.  That being said, mama didn't raise a fool.  I used to be embarrassed when we'd go places and my mom would complain about poor service to get a discount at a restaurant or electronics store.  The apple didn't fall far from the tree though. Take too long to bring my food out at a restaurant if you want to. "May I see your manager please (after the food is delivered of course)?"  I did the same thing with DirecTV...again...this year.

A couple months ago I signed up for DirecTV's Whole Home DVR Service.  This was the final piece to what I needed to keep me from going to UVerse.  Well I've been having some problems with my service and I used that as an opportunity to haggle DirecTV some.  The key to this is when you call, ask to directly speak with Customer Retention.  Skip all the other stuff.

I explained how I've been a loyal customer for years, paid the premium to have the Whole Home DVR Service and that service isn't working properly and how I needed to be compensated in some fashion or - and this is the key - I'll cancel my subscription and go to UVerse since they already have my phone and internet business.

At that exact moment it was like the gates of heaven opened up, choirs started singing, birds started chirping, the stars got a little brighter...you get the point.  The rep immediately started typing away and said she would give me $20 off per month for 6 months (the duration of football season).  Let's do the math: 6 months times $20 per month equals $120 off.  $300 initial price minus $120 equals $180 for the Sunday NFL Ticket.  $180 divided by 17 weeks of the NFL season equals about $10.50 per week.  Pretty good huh?  Most people would stop there right?

Not Cheryl Myers' son.

I continued to explain how I had friends who were just now signing up for DirecTV that were being rewarded with package deals as new customers and yet each year my bill continued to increase as a loyal customer.  Again I hear her typing away and next thing I know she comes back saying I'll get an extra $10 off my overall bill (equates to negating the $10 per month HD service fee) for the next 24 months and after that, if I call again, they'll give it to me for another 24 months.  Well for the NFL season, that now takes me down to $120 for Sunday NFL Ticket.  $120 divided by 17 weeks in the NFL season equals me watching EVERY SINGLE NFL GAME for a whopping $7 a week.

So if any of you are looking for me during this NFL season on a Sunday I'll be in my Man Cave...well...pretty much all day.  I'll go to the 7am service at my church and from noon until about 10pm at night I'll be in the Cave with my remote in one hand, a drink in the other, laptop to follow my fantasy teams progress at my side and some food nearby.

Oh...and I forgot to mention...someone is coming out on Friday afternoon to fix my problems with my Whole Home DVR service.  A service call usually runs $44.99.  "But mam...do you realize how flawed it is that I have to pay to have one of your employees come out to fix something that I'm not responsible for its technical flaws?"  More typing.  Response: "As a valued customer Mr. Myers, we'd be happy to provide with this service free of charge."  Worst part about all this?  I'll probably call back in a few days and see if I can get them to knock another $5 or $10 off a month somehow.  Why settle right?  Worst they can say is no.

Yep.  Cheryl will be proud when I tell her about this one.

-M.G.M.

T.O.

T.O. signed with the Cincinnati Bengals this week and it seems people have two different views on the signing. On one hand you have people who don't like T.O. the person and as a result, they say they can't figure this signing out at all.

Then you have people like myself that think it's actually a pretty good move if you think the Bengals are trying to make a serious run at a Super Bowl this year. Taking a good look at this offense, there's no way that one can truly say adding T.O. to the mix makes them worse. Imagine the Bengals breaking the huddle with Carson Palmer under center, Cedric Benson in the backfield, Ochocinco and T.O. split out wide, Jordan Shipley (or one of their other receivers) in the slot and Jermaine Gresham at T.E. Who do you cover?

It's become apparent that Antonio Bryant isn't healthy (if he was they wouldn't have a need for T.O. and I'm sure if the Bengals' brass could go back and un-do that signing they would in a heart beat. For whatever reason they haven't given Quan Cosby a true shot at receiver and I kind of see his career somewhat mimicking Wes Welker to a degree in that it may take him getting cut and going to a team that knows how to properly use him prior to him having a true impact in the league from the receiver position.

A lot of people have painted T.O. as a continued distraction but I think they are still having glimpses of T.O. from several years ago. Typically in his first year with a new team he's always a model citizen and realistically, I really have a hard time believing he is such a cancer to a team. Sure we've all seen the blow ups but by and large all he wants to do is win and strongly feels that he can be a big part of a team's success. I'd have to say that in most circumstances, I have to agree with him. T.O. managed to put up decent numbers last year despite the worst QB situation he's been in. Hell, it was the worst team situation he's been in. You didn't hear him causing any ruckus. He just did the best with what he had. From everything I can see he's calmed down a bit and realizes that his career is on the downswing and now he wants a ring.

I think this move obviously helps Carson Palmer and T.O. probably wouldn't be in Cincinnati now had Palmer not vouched for him since their recent work outs together in Los Angeles. T.O. on the other side of the field makes it damn near impossible to double team Ochocinco or shade coverage his direction so his numbers and production should improve as well. Having a tight end that can stretch the seam like Jermaine Gresham will keep any safety honest and all of them combined make it that much more difficult to stuff the box which could bode very well for the running game.

If everything goes according to plan, Cincinnati could make a lot of noise this year. People are quick to forget that Cincinnati swept their division last year. The addition of T.O. can't make them any worse offensively.

Look out NFL fans. The newest reality TV show will be on your screen every Sunday this fall and T.O. is the newest co-star.

-M.G.M.

Somebody Tell Albert Haynesworth, We Want Our Money Back!

Playing devil’s advocate for a second: I understand Albert Haynesworth didn’t come to the Redskins under the same regime that is currently there. They went out and hired Mike Shanahan who has completely shaken things up and determined that he doesn’t want the same defense. So now Haynesworth is unhappy and doesn’t want to be in Washington. He wants to be traded. That part, I understand. Or at least I understand what I think he’s saying. I don’t agree with it but I think I understand. Haynesworth feels that he’s being forced to change positions without his permission. Cool. You don’t like that. More power to you. I’ve even seen some try to defend Haynesworth position by basically saying “he’d do what any of us would do” when negotiating any kind of deal in life.
I can’t say I agree though.

If I was Albert Haynesworth and I truly had ZERO intention of playing for the Washington Redskins again I wouldn’t accept the $21 million bonus he received on April 1st of this year. Let’s say that one more time. Matter of fact - let’s type it out so we common folk can see all the zeroes: $21,000,000. That’s how much money Haynesworth accepted as a roster bonus for being a member of the Washington Redskins. Haynesworth should’ve sat out and probably done the opposite of T.O. when he was protesting the Eagles. Instead of holding court in his driveway and doing pushups and stuff in front of the media, Haynesworth should’ve sat outside the Redskins facilities and invited the media to watch him eat ice cream or whatever kind of food Haynesworth enjoys.

But no. Good ole Al took that money and now he wants to run.  Too bad the Redskins are now coming for that $21 million. . I hope he didn’t spend it all in one place.

I think the true tragedy in all of this is that not only is he letting his teammates down (even though he doesn’t care to be their teammates anymore) but that he’s now creating two problems, one for himself and one for others.

I can’t see how any future teammate can trust him to be there when he’s already received a lucrative deal and bounced. I mean, how are you to rely on this guy when he’s been paid more than anyone else at the position (ever...in life...if I'm not mistaken) but ultimately even THAT was not good enough? Who is even a potential trade partner? I mean, what GM wants to deal with that headache?

Along the same lines, the second problem is that now, it’s going to be tough for a defensive tackle in the future to get similar deals. I follow Darnell Dockett on Twitter and from what I've seen of him in interviews and NFL films behind the scenes stuff, I like him as a player and a person a lot. He seems like a guy that brings his lunch pail to work every day. What I would hate is that when it comes time for his payday, a GM has to think in the back of his mind “well I wonder if Dockett might pull a Haynesworth on me. Better be careful with how much we give him.”

I know it’s not Haynesworth’s job to figure out that kind of stuff. But it is his job to do what he’s paid to do and that’s play the game of FOOTBALL. If he doesn’t agree with what he’s being asked to do then he shouldn’t have taken the money.

So in my best Houston rapper voice (was it Slim Thug or ESG?): “Somebody Tell Albert Haynesworth, We Want Our Money Back!”

-M.G.M.